#7: Trying new things pt. 2

let's try new things wooo

In my last post, I shared how our curiosity naturally erodes as we go from kid to adult and that there’s still plenty of time to try new things. This week, I’m building on where I left off. I’ll share why I think trying new things is good for us, how inertia gets in the way, and how to actually decide and then start trying new things. I also felt compelled to share some new things I’ve tried in the last week because I gotta practice what I preach (not trying to seem preachy tho).

How trying new things is beneficial

Any time you try something new, you start at level 0. As a result, it doesn’t take a lot to start making progress which makes us feel warm and fuzzy inside. At the same time, it can be humbling because typically we’re not good at something the first time you try it. If you ever feel like you’re getting too arrogant in respect to your job, hobby, etc, just try a few new things, experience sucking at some of them, and that should help to reduce some of the cockiness.

While doing the new thing, time seems to slow down and you become more aware of your surroundings. There’s new sights, smells, tastes, feels, and because you’re experiencing it for the first time, you have to pay attention to them. For example, when doing an out-and-back hike for the first time, the first half of the hike always ends up feeling longer than the way back.

Trying new things inevitably leads to learning about yourself. If you try something for the first time and you liked it, that’s awesome. Now you know that you like this new thing and you can keep doing it. If you didn’t have a good time, that’s still helpful because you know to avoid it in the future.

Through new experiences, we’re able to able to update our sense of limits and boundaries. Previously, you may have thought you had no skill in something, when in reality it wasn’t zero skill, but rather an unknown value. Now there’s a more accurate, detailed map of ourself no matter whether it was a positive or negative experience.

A problem can arise if you don’t try enough new things. A sense of uneasiness surfaces when we realize that we don’t know if what we’re doing is based on preference or familiarity. Imagine doing something repeatedly for a long period of time only to one day question whether you actually enjoy it. There’s a fundamental human need to feel in control of our own life and always operating in the zone of familiarity throws away a certain amount of autonomy to auto-pilot mode.

We all have friends who have different hobbies than us and feeling left out always sucks. Imagine being the only person in a friend group who doesn’t know how to ski. It wouldn’t be that fun sitting at the base village sipping an overpriced hot chocolate for hours while your friends are hurling themselves down a mountain. Trying something new is a way to bond and become closer to friends who we already got along with. And of course, it can also lead to new friendships.

Inertia gets in the way

In the business world, there’s this term called ‘switching cost’ which is a cost that a consumer incurs from switching brands, products, services, or suppliers. Changing your phone plan which would require researching what new phone plan to get, driving to the new store, and waiting in line. There’s psychological cost in worrying about whether the new plan is actually going to be better and there’s an effort cost associated with filling out paperwork, canceling your old phone plan, and adding a new payment method. As a result, we often end up sticking with the products and services that we’re already familiar with. It’s part of the reason why subscriptions are such a strong business model.

This concept of switching cost can be applied to anything and I think of it as inertia - the tendency to do nothing or stay the same. Day-to-day, it can show up as choosing to do the same thing over and over even when we know it’s not as enjoyable as before. When we stick with something longer than we hope for, it’s because there’s this invisible sludge-like substance called inertia that slows us down or blocks us from transitioning from the current state to the next iteration of ourselves.

Imagine someone who works in marketing realizes over time that they’re no longer enjoying their work and would like to explore new roles. Since he/she has been working in the marketing field for several years now, their job title is now tied to their sense of identity and as a result, changing roles has inertia. Since there is a high switching cost to a change in career, the default action is inaction and to remain in the status quo.

There’s an asymmetry when it comes to trying new things because we know what we are giving up, but don’t know what we might gain. As a result, it can often feel like trying this new thing is a form of gambling because we’re trading away something quantifiable that’s known for the unknown. Unless, this marketing professional spends time intentionally reflecting on their career and exploring alternatives, they’ll gradually change their mindset from wanting to take a leap of faith via career change and instead justifying the decision to remain in the current state with ‘sucking it up’, distractions, or excuses. And eventually that little seed of a career pivot that popped into their head from seeing a friend deeply enjoying their work will evaporate.

How to decide what to try next?

There are several ways to decide what to try next. Some ways require conscious planning, evaluating, and decision making. However, others are quite straightforward and often don’t require giving up anything.

Start trying new things with small low-cost decisions that have zero trade-offs

I feel like we are confronted with so many mini forks in the road everyday and it’s up to us if we want to try something new or not. For example, I tried a new route from yoga class to Arvo cafe recently because there was a red light and I didn’t want to wait for it so I turned right instead of going straight. Since it was a new route, I was constantly looking around trying to figure out what the next turn should be. As a result, I saw some dope graffiti artwork that covered Kaka’ako. I managed to get to the cafe without any issues and I’m sure the time spent on this new route was within a margin of 30 seconds of the usual way.

Another bite-sized example is when I bought a bottle of Guatemalan hot sauce called Picamas just because it was discounted to $1 at the local Latin American grocery store. I had never heard of it, but this led to a conversation with my friend Stanley at dinner when he saw the bottle and started raving about how he traveled to Guatemala, tried the same hot sauce, and now it’s his favorite. I only bought it because it was $1 and who knows, maybe I wouldn’t have bought it if it was $3 or something. Find the new things that are low cost in time, money, effort and just try it - there’s so little risk.

What are your friends good at that you also think is cool?

If you’re already friends, then they’ll be happy to teach you something they find joy in doing. Tagging along with a friend makes it much easier to try something because the friend is also acting as the instructor, gear supplier, and maybe even transportation provider. I’ve wanted to try spearfishing because I find the primal nature of getting your own food instead of going to the grocery store appealing. I’ve gone a couple times with my friend Louis who picks me up (I don’t have a car), lends me his extra gun, and shows me how to fire, reload, and be safe. There’s simply too many logistics and costs associated with spearfishing for me to go out and do this by myself. s/o Louis 🤝

What do you enjoy consuming, but are not actively participating in?

If you enjoy watching NBA games, go play pickup at the local park or gym. If you enjoy eating out at restaurants, try cooking some of your favorite dishes at home. If you enjoy reading books, try writing (could just be journaling to yourself). For all these examples, there’s the added benefit of a deeper appreciation of those that have dedicated themselves to the craft. A month ago, I spent five hours making sushi (specifically nigiri) and now when I eat out at sushi restaurants, I notice myself watching the sushi chefs more because now I know how hard it is.

Find the adjacencies and build off existing things you already enjoy

If you like surfing, you could try kite surfing, foiling, or surf skating. If you’re like me and enjoy alpine skiing, then try backcountry, park, or telemarking. If you enjoy music, then try making mixes from other artists and if you’re already making mixes, then maybe try producing your own songs (Jon I hope you actually read my newsletter).

Constraints breed creativity

Rather than stressing about trying new things and feeling stumped, just stop trying and let the nature of constraints shape what new things you try. For example, I’m going to make dinner for some friends this week and one of them is vegetarian and also has a peanut allergy. Having these constraints means I can’t cook with meat or nuts and have to find ingredients that can emulate or replace what I would’ve originally used. I haven’t cooked much with tofu, tempeh, or meat substitutes and I probably wouldn’t try unless I had this constraint.

Even where I choose to live is based on constraints. Since I work with folks in China and Australia, my hours are best when I’m in between Asia and the west coast of the US. The time of day for meetings was a major factor to test out living in Hawaii last August and it’s also what has kept bringing me back (among other factors of course).

How to actually try something new

Create space for something new

For small new things, there’s likely no need to make tradeoffs or sacrifices, but for medium to large new things, you may have to clear up some time to make room. I try to de-commit from preexisting things that maybe were once great, but now feel more lukewarm. Tactically, this means scheduling meetings back to back all in the afternoon when I’m less ‘on’. This way I’m able to protect my morning time when I’m most focused and I can choose to read, surf, explore, or simply starting work earlier. I also try to keep my plans loose so that there’s always wiggle room for anything that comes up the night before or day of.

Travel

Traveling is a powerful forcing function for exposing yourself to new things. The language, food, transportation, and cultural mannerisms are all new and instant from the moment you land. In this sense, trying new things requires no additional effort and thought once you’ve decided to travel and then arrived at this new place.

Research and Prepare

Doing a bit of research can help to reduce the risk of failure and increase the chance for enjoyment. When deciding where to travel, I do a decent amount of research so I know what to bring and what types of experiences I want to have. If I’m trying to cook a new dish, I’ll look up a recipe to get the list of ingredients and the associated ratios.

Do a smaller version of it first

It’s easier to try something new when you lower the barrier to entry. For whatever you’re going to try, initially aim to try it with less money, less time, and less difficulty than you think.

Do it alone and in private

Lower the fear of looking like a fool by trying this new thing in the comfort of your own place and don’t make it public. There’s no need to announce it on IG or tell your friends if you don’t want to. That way, if it doesn’t work, then it’s as if nothing happened.

Phone a friend

But if you need that extra push, then find a friend who’s already doing it and ask them to take you or give you a dose of friendly peer pressure. This has helped me start running (s/o Dion) and writing this blog (s/o Jen).

Make it sustainable

There’s a decent chance you’ll trying something new, enjoy it, and want to continue doing it. In these awesome situations, it’s important to make it sustainable from a cost, logistics, and effort perspective. During my first two weeks back here in Hawaii, I had no transportation so I was carrying my 8’ 8” longboard over a mile each way to get to the beach park. If I didn’t get a moped with surf rack, I would definitely be surfing less because of how tiring carrying the board by hand is.

A combination of all of these things

I learned how to ride a bike without training wheels when I was 14. For the longest time, I avoided learning because after age 6ish it felt like it was too late. It wasn’t until I was hanging out with my friend Albert with no plans (freeing up time) in his quiet neighborhood (in private) and he more-or-less forced me to try (doing it with a friend) that I learned how to finally ride a bike.

New things I’ve tried recently

It’s funny how when you think of an idea more, you’re more likely to act on it. As I was writing part 1, I reflected on the new things that I’ve tried and because I was already thinking about new things, I ended up actually trying some more new things this week. I think this is what the astrology girls on TikTok call ✨manifestation✨.

• Went to a new yoga class taught by this guy named Scoop (an instructor I’ve heard good things about, s/o Feeb)

• Coming from California, I’ve been missing good Mexican food in Hawaii so I decided to make pollo asado. To get the ingredients, I had to go to the only Latin American grocery store in Hawaii and because I’m still phone-less, I had to memorize the directions for how to get there before heading out. It was my first time cooking with achiote, chipotle, ancho, and guajillo chilis and also first time visiting that area.

• Made papaya salad ‘som tum’ for the first time. I didn’t follow the recipe closely and also accidentally made it ‘Thai spicy’ aka very spicy, but it still came out alright.

• Surfed a new break called ‘Courts’ at Ala Moana Beach Park. Some friends I met from beach volleyball told me that they were going the next day and I decided to give it a try since I’ve been going to the same break most of the time. I’m used to surfing lefts and I’m regular stance so surfing this new right was a nice switch up.

• Went to the annual Shinnyo Floating Lantern event where we spent time writing messages on lanterns to pay respect to our loved ones who have passed away. It was refreshing to take a step back and regain some perspective. Doing this made me feel more connected to living in Hawaii because it’s something you wouldn’t find anywhere else and isn’t something that tourists would ever do.

• Tried a new coffee shop called Downtown Honolulu since I was meeting up with my friend Jen (who also has a newsletter). I wouldn’t have come here on my own since it’s further than the other coffee shops I’ve been frequenting, but she suggested this place because she was already going to be in the area. It was less than 5 minutes extra of travel time which just goes to show how settled into our routines we get.

• Tried another coffee shop (more like Vietnamese restaurant) called Insomnia Coffee. The coffee is absolutely terrible (what I imagine those giant Costco tubs of Folger’s tastes like), but at least they have good A/C and their food seemed solid. May come back if I ever need a quick bite.

I’ve got about one month left in Hawaii so we’ll see what other new things I try. And after this, there’ll be plenty of new things based on where I’m traveling to 👀.

What have you been thinking of doing, but haven’t done yet?

As always, leave a comment or message me on Twitter if you have any questions/feedback/ideas!