Hi Matt! I want to share my gratefulness towards you after reading this essay. My friend Heyu recommended your blog to me a few weeks ago as I am exploring similar journey as you were, or to some some extent you are still going through. I was in a period of ambivalence as I was dipping my toes in some new thoughts but was hesitant to go in due to commercial concerns (you can take a business person out of corporate/tech job, but you can't take the business mindset out of her 😂). After reading this essay of yours, I had so much resonance and most importantly, feel so much more liberated of just treating my own year of experimentation with zero pressure on income (and I am grateful that I am in a privileged position to do so). I also started my own Substack blog to documenting my own experience. I found we have so many aspects overlapping (e.g. Product Management, Psychotherapy - I am starting my final year of qualification and clinical placement in September, Skiing, weightlifting and outdoor adventures). I am looking forward to reading more of your journey and connecting in person/video at some point. ❤️
Hey Jenn! Thanks for reading. Congrats on taking the leap! I know it wasn't an easy decision. It's cool that you've also started writing and learning psychotherapy. I've heard of gestalt but haven't practiced it or experienced it as much as understanding the high level view of the human as whole. I know there's some overlap with Hakomi (the method I'm learning) since our textbook references gestalt, IFS, somatic experiencing, etc. It seems like a lot of these methods originated around the same time and have drawn inspiration from each other which is cool. Looking forward to staying connected!
Thanks for your support! Just had a look about Hakomi, it’s very interesting. It feels there are a lot of similarities with Gestalt as you said. Ultimately as we practice more and more, modalities won’t matter as much as it all converge to be a very integrated approach with personal/individual touch. At least that’s what I heard from my tutor and clinical director from my placement. IFS originates from object relations theory but has evolved beyond that which I am also interested in exploring further. Looking forward to staying connected in the journey of exploration together!
This truly resonated with me Matt! It's almost like being on the journey alongside you with it feels magical. Sparked a lot of introspection on my end, especially around ideas I haven't put into words. Top three I like: 1) “Now, I’ve stopped viewing work and non-work as a binary and embraced working with multiple modalities.” 2) “Impact is something that’s felt, not measured.” 3) “Rather than trying to bury the PM in me, I am now trying to give him a seat at the table.”
Btw, I’m curious how did you do IFS therapy? Any resources you would recommend?
Thanks for telling me what resonated the most! It's super helpful. I've done it in 2 forms: working with Theo in a session over Zoom and in-person at the climate leaders' retreat that I mentioned that was in November in Boulder, CO. Theo's Twitter is @nowtheo, you can DM him to schedule a session!
Matt that is a wonderful read - beautifully written and I can relate to many points you mention. So many, in fact, that I don’t bother highlighting them here 😄.
Brings me back to our meeting in Bali last year and it’s nice to understand the context around it through your article.
thanks Georg! that's a high compliment haha, I'm glad we met up in Canggu. at the time, it wasn't clear what I was feeling in that moment, I'm excited to follow along your journey too!
Loved this (and glad you didn't break it up into many posts.) It seems like it takes time to detox the desire to "achieve" even when removed from traditional work. And maybe successful people are most generous with their time because they have become able to measure success beyond immediate output and feel this pressure to a lesser degree?
"successful" was determined by my judgement but also objective measures too like their job title and I can probably guess their income. in any case, I think successful people also have a sense of freedom with how they spend their time. An unsuccessful might be very rich but if they don't have control over their time, then I'd consider that not so great.
Staying to a budget in NYC is hard, living right next to Costco helps and also I don't really eat out or go out that often. I still very much value the energy and the ability to meet so many people tho
Once I was actually living off of savings, I had my Copernicus moment and realized that money is just one of the many factors orbiting in my life.
This financial detox has reset my money microbiome. In the past, gluttonous splurging temporarily made me feel better. Now, I employ money for nourishment. Even though its relative importance has decreased, I appreciate money more now. I still want financial wealth and the safety and security that comes with it, but now I view it as an inevitable byproduct of following my curiosity and helping people.
You need less than you think
Leading up to quitting, I conservatively estimated that I would spend $5,000 a month. I based this off of my pre-sabbatical lifestyle which was the best approximation to anchor to at the time. In reality, this year, I’ve spent around $3,000 per month. I spent $500 during my least expensive month and $5,000 during my most expensive month with no noticeable correlation to overall happiness. This unexpected frugality happened without forcing my lifestyle through the constraints of a budget. I simply reduced spending on things that I no longer value and kept spending on things that I do value. As a result, my perceived quality of spending improved without any noticeable decrease in quality of life.
Hi Matt! I want to share my gratefulness towards you after reading this essay. My friend Heyu recommended your blog to me a few weeks ago as I am exploring similar journey as you were, or to some some extent you are still going through. I was in a period of ambivalence as I was dipping my toes in some new thoughts but was hesitant to go in due to commercial concerns (you can take a business person out of corporate/tech job, but you can't take the business mindset out of her 😂). After reading this essay of yours, I had so much resonance and most importantly, feel so much more liberated of just treating my own year of experimentation with zero pressure on income (and I am grateful that I am in a privileged position to do so). I also started my own Substack blog to documenting my own experience. I found we have so many aspects overlapping (e.g. Product Management, Psychotherapy - I am starting my final year of qualification and clinical placement in September, Skiing, weightlifting and outdoor adventures). I am looking forward to reading more of your journey and connecting in person/video at some point. ❤️
Hey Jenn! Thanks for reading. Congrats on taking the leap! I know it wasn't an easy decision. It's cool that you've also started writing and learning psychotherapy. I've heard of gestalt but haven't practiced it or experienced it as much as understanding the high level view of the human as whole. I know there's some overlap with Hakomi (the method I'm learning) since our textbook references gestalt, IFS, somatic experiencing, etc. It seems like a lot of these methods originated around the same time and have drawn inspiration from each other which is cool. Looking forward to staying connected!
Thanks for your support! Just had a look about Hakomi, it’s very interesting. It feels there are a lot of similarities with Gestalt as you said. Ultimately as we practice more and more, modalities won’t matter as much as it all converge to be a very integrated approach with personal/individual touch. At least that’s what I heard from my tutor and clinical director from my placement. IFS originates from object relations theory but has evolved beyond that which I am also interested in exploring further. Looking forward to staying connected in the journey of exploration together!
This truly resonated with me Matt! It's almost like being on the journey alongside you with it feels magical. Sparked a lot of introspection on my end, especially around ideas I haven't put into words. Top three I like: 1) “Now, I’ve stopped viewing work and non-work as a binary and embraced working with multiple modalities.” 2) “Impact is something that’s felt, not measured.” 3) “Rather than trying to bury the PM in me, I am now trying to give him a seat at the table.”
Btw, I’m curious how did you do IFS therapy? Any resources you would recommend?
Thanks for telling me what resonated the most! It's super helpful. I've done it in 2 forms: working with Theo in a session over Zoom and in-person at the climate leaders' retreat that I mentioned that was in November in Boulder, CO. Theo's Twitter is @nowtheo, you can DM him to schedule a session!
Matt that is a wonderful read - beautifully written and I can relate to many points you mention. So many, in fact, that I don’t bother highlighting them here 😄.
Brings me back to our meeting in Bali last year and it’s nice to understand the context around it through your article.
thanks Georg! that's a high compliment haha, I'm glad we met up in Canggu. at the time, it wasn't clear what I was feeling in that moment, I'm excited to follow along your journey too!
This piece is beautiful Matt. So excited to see what 2024 brings! Grateful to learn from you 🙏🏽
thanks Saalik! excited for you too!
We met at the SF commons writing Sunday months ago. This is a great piece, glad you wrote it. Good to see you still writing.
oh hey Manish! Yeah, I remember. Thanks for reading :)
Very insightful!
I love this 🙌 can’t wait to see what you create in 2024
thanks!! excited to see what you cook up this year too :)
My experience of "sabbatical" eerily matches yours. We even started at essentially the same time. keep going my friend.
excited to chat!
Loved this (and glad you didn't break it up into many posts.) It seems like it takes time to detox the desire to "achieve" even when removed from traditional work. And maybe successful people are most generous with their time because they have become able to measure success beyond immediate output and feel this pressure to a lesser degree?
Also -- would be interested to hear in future posts how you keep your budget so low. $3K in NY...impressive!
"successful" was determined by my judgement but also objective measures too like their job title and I can probably guess their income. in any case, I think successful people also have a sense of freedom with how they spend their time. An unsuccessful might be very rich but if they don't have control over their time, then I'd consider that not so great.
Staying to a budget in NYC is hard, living right next to Costco helps and also I don't really eat out or go out that often. I still very much value the energy and the ability to meet so many people tho
Great article. I especially liked this part:
🡻🡻🡻🡻🡻🡻🡻🡻🡻🡻🡻
Once I was actually living off of savings, I had my Copernicus moment and realized that money is just one of the many factors orbiting in my life.
This financial detox has reset my money microbiome. In the past, gluttonous splurging temporarily made me feel better. Now, I employ money for nourishment. Even though its relative importance has decreased, I appreciate money more now. I still want financial wealth and the safety and security that comes with it, but now I view it as an inevitable byproduct of following my curiosity and helping people.
You need less than you think
Leading up to quitting, I conservatively estimated that I would spend $5,000 a month. I based this off of my pre-sabbatical lifestyle which was the best approximation to anchor to at the time. In reality, this year, I’ve spent around $3,000 per month. I spent $500 during my least expensive month and $5,000 during my most expensive month with no noticeable correlation to overall happiness. This unexpected frugality happened without forcing my lifestyle through the constraints of a budget. I simply reduced spending on things that I no longer value and kept spending on things that I do value. As a result, my perceived quality of spending improved without any noticeable decrease in quality of life.
thanks for reading Ryan!